Tiny Human

My Dearest, Sweetest, Most Precious Tiny Human:

I love you. I love you in a way I did not know existed. I want to hold you all.the.time. and I want to make you smile and I don’t want you to ever cry (except when hungry or wet) and I want life for you to be a smooth road with no hurt, heartache or pain. Of course, that won’t happen but that is my wish for you. Have to admit, I am surprised I feel this way. We all know how I feel about children: they are cute and fun in small doses. AND you are a late in life baby for all of us (fun fact: your mommy gave birth to you at the same age her mommy was when she gave birth to her) and you were supposed to be a girl! But that doesn’t matter now that you are here. You are here and you are perfect.

I want you to know that you were prayed for, wanted and loved long before you got here. Your mommy has always wanted a family of her own…a husband she could love and children she could love, raise, teach and play with. You are the answer to so many prayers for her. She wanted everything to be perfect for your arrival: she ate right, she read books, she prayed and she really thought she had time left to get your room ready for you and all the stuff babies need. However, you came one month prematurely and she was ready to cry because this wasn’t how it was supposed to go….but you taught her the first lesson of parenthood: you are never prepared for parenthood…you just dive in and do the best you can. Another fun fact: she went into labor with you the day of her baby shower!

Your family isn’t rich and we are not geniuses but we do have love, we aren’t dumb and your family background is one of strength as you have already exhibited. Born a month early and slightly underweight, in less than 6 weeks, you are now over 8 pounds, have grown 2 more inches, holding your little head up and trying to roll over!! You are growing up so fast!!! Please slow down….let us revel in your innocence and dependency a little while longer. Oh, we are pretty good looking so you have that in your favor.

And already you are displaying your personality: oh, so serious (for real, it is like you were born and went straight to adulthood…smile, Tiny Human!) and pretty adamant in what you like and don’t like. You throw your pacifier when you don’t want it, you fight sleep as if you were a teenager with a bedtime curfew and bath time is a nightmare…until Mommy washes your hair. Then, you are in heaven.

So now I guess it is time to introduce you to your family (as if you have not had enough of us already). And I know everyone has a different name for you…roll with it. You know we are talking to you, especially when it is said in those weird high pitched voices we use when talking to you.

Your Parents: They are both reformed and transformed. No lie. They were both kick ass, hard ass, take no prisoners single folks. Your daddy was a player and your mama had no problem kicking ass and getting loud when she felt disrespected. But God transformed them into quiet, compromising, responsible adults who first had to be ready for each other before they could be ready for you. They are hardworking people with a healthy fear of the Lord and an attitude of gratitude for all their blessings.  They have love and respect for themselves and others. They love you so very, very much and all they now do….they do for you.

Your Grandparents: They are older and not as active but that does not change their love for you. They never expected a grandchild, and now that you are here, it brings an incredible joy to them. Your grandmother’s arms are not as stable or secure now but they are filled with just as much love and protection as they were when they first held me so very long ago. She will hold you, sing to you and read to you. She will tell you how happy you make her. She will change your diapers (even the stinky ones) with a smile on her face because you are her new blessing.  You will be the one who will be the glue to keep her children together long after she and Daddy are gone…at least, that is her hope. Your granddaddy is not a demonstrative man…he does say I love you but not often. Instead, he will talk to you, he will teach you, he will impart his knowledge, wisdom and experiences to you. He may not play ball or catch with you but he will tell you all about nature and the universe and how to be both respectful and respectable. He will make sure that when you are visiting, that you are a part of all family activities including meals, even if we have to take turns holding you while we eat.

Your Uncle: He isn’t around much as he has a severe case of wanderlust and tends to work overseas. He is generous, smart but very stubborn and opinionated. To defuse future arguments with him, just nod along but he won’t tell you anything wrong. None of us will. It will probably just come out wrong. He is unsure around you as he needs to interact with and be interacted with, so he says he will wait until you are bigger/older. But we both know he sneaks in to hold you and talk to you. He ain’t slick.

Auntie #1: She loves you more than anything or anyone and wants only the best for you. You need to know this because sometimes she will come off a little too strong, especially if she is worried or concerned. She has dreams and plans for you (as we all do) but if they don’t align with what you want to do in life/with your life, don’t be afraid to tell her so. At the end of the day, it IS your life. And she will both respect and encourage that.

Me: Don’t tell anyone, but I am going to be your favorite. I am going to be the fun one, the one whose door you will be knocking on when you run away from home. I will be the one with pizza, junk food and outings to the movies, museums and State Fair. I will be a little controlling, a lot impatient and will probably pop that butt when you misbehave but I will love you so much and tell you all the time how amazing, handsome and smart you are. I am not the one with a lot of money or even the one who can guarantee you an uncle to play with you and take you to sporting events, but I will move out of my comfort zone for you and pony up for trips to amusement parks, circuses and yes, even a baseball game. Because you are so worth it.

So in closing, welcome to the world Tiny Human! It can be big and scary but also amazing and wonderful and filled with surprises. It isn’t all heartache and struggles, neither is it all rainbows and happy endings but a wonderful mix of both. Prayers to the Higher Power and the Universe that we, your family, will raise you to appreciate both and navigate your way with honesty, respect, courage and strength.

Love you to pieces and to the moon and back,

The (Future) Favorite Aunt


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