A lot has been happening since last I posted and I am going to try and catch everyone up as best I can. Two things to know up front: I have zero idea how this post is going to turn out…I have been trying to draft it, format it and figure it out, all to no avail. So just tossing it up in the air and how it turns it out, it turns out. Second thing, nothing is related to Prince Charming. That is a first in a long time and I am kinda proud of that…I think I need a moment. Okay, moment’s over, so let’s just dive into the post.

The Roach has been exterminated…some things need to be stopped before they get started. Not that I was falling for the man or I really felt there was potential and promise to be found there…the man just wasn’t for me on any level. He doesn’t read books, has not seen the inside of a museum since an elementary school field trip to Air & Space and has no clue what A Streetcar Named Desire is. I don’t care if he’s never seen it (I tried to make through for the first time last week but I couldn’t…it started off confused and crazy and escalated from there)…at least know what it is. And despite his declarations of attention and affection…I was the one making all the efforts. He sent one word texts at 7pm after a day of silence, and on days off, the man slept until 3pm. I told him that he was not showing me nor giving me a reason to give another relationship a chance…rather, he was showing me why I was staying out of them. His response two hours later? “Sorry, I was looking up tools in my quest to be the ultimate employee.” We have not spoken a word since.

Dottie had an amazing doctor’s visit and it wasn’t due to me. An hour before her visit, I was eating a LARGE bowl of Coldstone Creamery’s Founding Fathers ice cream creation, which had been preceded by Chik-fil-a’s spicy chicken sandwich and waffle fries. But Dottie pulled through…her sugar level was 135, my blood pressure was excellent (it usually is) and my weight…while I hadn’t lost anything, I also did not gain, which was good news. The best news was my A1C reading (A1C is your sugar level average for 90 days…the scale is 5-15, with 5-7 being optimum)…when I was first diagnosed, my A1C was a 12. No bueno. Last week, my A1C was an 8.5!!! Not optimum, but damned good for me.

So I told you guys about the job ending at the end of the month. Well, it’s done and over. The assignment ended Friday, 4 days earlier than planned. It really isn’t a surprise: the interns (one of which is my replacement) start Monday and I was out of office a lot interviewing and job searching. I took advantage of the advance notice to plaster the city and job boards with an updated resume…I simply did not want to be suddenly out on the street, suitcase in hand and no idea where to go or where to begin. There was also that matter of unpleasantness that I will say, I brought on myself…everyone in your circle is not part of your circle and the other party showed there is a wrong way to do the right thing. I did write my team individual goodbye letters but there is something else I want to tell them….I want them to NOT like the new window person as much as they liked me and I want them to continue to strive for rewards and recognition. Don’t become complacent…things can change on a dime and what’s best for the company may not be what’s best for the team or for them. And for God’s sake, when the high maintenance/high strung chick from the 4th floor shows up, give her to Boy Wonder or The Favorite (they are her BFFs behind me)…anyone but the Hard Working Tech…those two lock horns something fierce and she has the ears of those more influential than The Sherriff.

I am going to close this post by writing what I will miss most about the members of my team/circle…there will be so much but really going to try to narrow it down. Bear with me:

Feisty One: Firs thing, this chick wants a name change. Not happening. Feisty is described as being full of animation, energy, or courage; spirited; spunky; plucky. Yeah, if that does not describe that girl, I don’t know what does. No name changes here. What I will miss most about her is her ability to check me while still having my back. That is a feat not many can accomplish but she does it effortlessly.

The Hard Head: This dude….besides the #sockgame, I am going to miss his tough love. We had a huge clash a while back where I went off and ghetto black chick basically cursed him out, and I still feel badly about that. The man is a hard worker, did his best to give me advice, suggestions and software to make me a more valuable employee…but he doles out that tough love. Like your parents leave you in jail or put you out the house tough love. I may not have liked it, but it had me more on the straight and narrow than I want to admit.

The Special One: I am going to miss his agreeing to disagree…we rarely clashed because as soon as he heard the screechy bass (trust me, it’s possible) in my voice, he backed down. For The Special One, being right or wrong is not as important as a peaceful environment.

The Favorite: Dude is a straight clown who could make me laugh even when I was at the nth level of pisstivity with him. Does anyone remember that scene in the movie Summer School when Chainsaw lets out a huge yell before the big test and says: “Tension breaker. Had to be done.”? That’s the Favorite and his drops of humor…they are tension breakers that are truly needed at times.

The One I Love: His generosity. We would buy each other breakfasts and lunches and not worry about who owed who what. When I was broke, he had no problem springing for me to eat. When I was sick, he was the one with tea and cough drops and mulberry bars to help Dottie even herself out. I felt like his favorite kid sister, and I love him for that and so much more.

The Smart One: The man is a walking encyclopedia about just any subject under the sun and I will miss his nuggets of wisdom and trivia. Not to mention his smartness. Honestly, if he weren’t so lean, I could have a full fledged crush on him…intelligence is sexy. And he needs some chocolate in his life. If only I could somehow become a petite brunette….

The Awesome One: I am going to miss her…the list is too long to go into detail so I will just leave it at that.

The Sherriff: His dry sense of humor when it’s after hours…and his funky ties and socks. They hint at a personality not evident behind the corporate mask.

Uncle Ben: The man is strange and weird and old school all the way but I did enjoy our talks during the rides home. His employment history is quite colorful, his life experiences are far ranging and his insights on things spiritual are pretty deep.

The Hard Working Tech: He was my Harpo and I was his Sophia…he knew how to cheer me up when I was down and to put a smile on my face no matter my mood. I am smiling right now thinking about him.

Boy Wonder: He will not win any popularity contests but his thirst for knowledge and his eagerness to share said knowledge (with me at least) is unmatched. He’s very perceptive, empathetic and he always opened the window without complaint (again, with me at least).

The Good Looking Tech: I’m going to miss everything…he was my whipping boy at times, he was my confidant, he was my teacher in things not work related. His laughter was infectious and our secret jokes had others looking at us with raised eyebrows. With the Good Looking One, it wasn’t work….it was the Whorephanage. The Nope (no-pay) Whorephanage.

The Sweet One: I am going to miss our random conversations….we talked about everything from work to men to kids to the evils of having to do laundry.

Sunshine: I am going to miss her smile…it can light up an entire room and her sparkling personality illuminates her and anyone she chooses to associate with.

The Guys in the Mailroom: They brought me food, they help the team out everyday and I think what I will miss most about them is how well they know and do their jobs. They take pride in their work and that is rarity in any workplace right now.

Captain America: According to him, there will be nothing to miss as he now has a reason to come to DC. He says there will be lunches and movies and he will miss seeing me in the window. I’ll keep you posted on that.

And there you have it…everything that has been going on. I still don’t know what I am going to do without these guys, but thinking Monday I will sleep in and masturbate. I told the One I Love I will think of him when I do that. Don’t get me wrong, I am excited about new things happening, but it’s like having lived on Walton Mountain for forever and heading off to an out of state college…I am going to miss my family. But for now, I need to shower and start dinner and fingers crossed to hear something back from all the interviewing and resume giving I have been doing. As always, thanks for stopping past and reading and as usual….enjoy your day!


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