Slow News Day

I have not blogged in a bit, and the reason is I wanted to be able to share good news with you all. Unfortunately, the particular piece of news I wanted to share is still in limbo. Maybe I am impatient, maybe the other parties are at fault. Who knows? I guess if I look at it in just the right way at the right time of day, it can still be considered good news;  however, it brings on my rant about how doing the right thing never works for me. But before I get into my rant filled update, I have a process progress report: while biding my time, I came across emails exchanged between Him and I at the height of the fiasco and all I can say is: OMG!!!!,  accompanied by several double face palms. I am issuing an apology to my entire Panel, you readers and anyone who was subject/privy to my complete and utter insanity during that period. Reading the lies and mixed signals on him’s end and the pleadings and justifications on my end (now that I am mostly emotionally detached and objective) makes me cringe, wince and give thanks that my common sense finally made its way home.

So on to the rant filled update: I have had two job interviews in the past 10 days!! Exciting, right? I mean, I definitely thought it was. And the best thing, one was for a permanent job! The other one was for a long term (at least 7 months) temp assignment that has plenty of potential to become permanent. The interview for the permanent job was first: it is with a non-profit that would allow me to utilize my skills while keeping me busy. The job offers a livable wage, a monthly health care per diem, paid holidays, vacations and sick days. Best part is I can walk to work in under 10 minutes. No commute, no delays or crowds on metro. Worst parts are they rely on funding from the city government, not the Feds so not quite sure how stable they are fiscally and no chance to expand my social circle..aka meet new men. I think the interview went well: I aced the skills assessment, gave thoughtful, insightful answers to her questions and asked questions that showed my interest in not only the position, but the company also.

The interview for the contractor position I had mixed feelings about. First, they wanted to interview with me on Inauguration Day. I had no issues with them wanting to interview me on the day we celebrated both Dr. King’s birthday and the second term of our President. It is private sector and I have worked private sector before…just because the government shuts down does not mean they do. No, my issue was they wanted to interview me on the most transportationally challenged day of the year (no cars, cabs or buses) and deal with incredibly large crowds of people on the subway, the only form of transport readily accessible. . The other issue I had was the commute…I interviewed directly with the company I would be assigned to and they are only two stops away from the Island and a 5 block walk from the metro station. One other factor was while they offered a livable wage, I would have to factor in at least $35/week transportation costs. But the firm is globally known and respected, and offered me a chance to enhance my existing skills set while teaching me new things I could embark on a brand new career with. The office is a little quiet but I get to meet new people (in other words…meet new men), learn new skills and I would be kept busy while being challenged.

So why am I ranting? Because I have heard absolutely NOTHING from either interview….I have called, left messages and nothing. I was on time (even on Inauguration Day!) for both interviews, professionally dressed, carried copies of my resume printed on the good paper, listened, gave great answers and asked amazing questions that showed my interest. I  jumped through the hoops, did the right things and for what? To still get the same treatment I would probably receive had I been late, failed assessments and just did not care. I do not know if I am being impatient or if they are being unprofessional and irresponsible but I cannot take it any longer. Waiting for a call, an email from these people saying yay or nay, I feel a lot like I did when I was waiting for him to return or when I was waiting around for AFO to respond to me: powerless, frustrated, ugly and unwanted. I feel like it is me, not them.

And I do NOT like feeling that way anymore, not for anyone or anything. While I really want one of the jobs to come through (leaning more towards the contractor position if given a choice) because my money situation is in dire straits (with the death of stupid, my arrangements are practically non-existent), I am not going to grovel and beg for them. If I do what I am supposed to do (the right thing), they should do so also. Not saying they should hire me simply because I did what I was supposed to but if they say they will call me, then call me. If you say you want someone ASAP and I tell you all I need is 24 hours notice…where is my notice that either I am still in the running or you found someone else? In a way, it is worse than not getting called to interview at all…by calling me in, you are letting me know I am qualified and you are interested, yet apparently, you aren’t.

Well, I am done with my ranting. I am beginning a new job search on Monday and keeping fingers crossed that something comes through for me. I am ready for it, I want it and at this point…I need it. As always, thanks for stopping past and reading and as usual….enjoy your day!


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