Blog Post #3

THIS is utterly ridiculous…that I am spending so much time and energy writing about a man who is so unbelievably delusional, has such a selfish agenda and an incredible liar to boot is something I thought was reserved for Him.  I guess not and I never thought I would be saying this one at this stage of the game, but I would take him AND BTH at this point. Hell, I would cook them dinner with a smile and be happy to do so.

So, if you have been keeping count, this is post #3 in less than 24 hours and I ended the last post debating whether or not to let AFO know exactly who I was, and Chef, New Mommy and Artsy Craftsy agreed with Oscar. Tell him. Artsy Craftsy said it would KILL her for him NOT to remember who she was, so I did. I responded to his email, attached a face pic and told him he bought me white cotton socks. In less than 5 minutes, I got a phone call from the man. Remember this part as I found it interesting given all he said during (and after) the phone call.

Of course he remembered me; he missed me sooo much and he never ignored my email to him…he never received it. Come on, I knew him…he was not that sort of guy and he was so glad we had re-connected. After all, we had a relationship. He wanted to see me every night he was in town and asked what I had been up to? I told him I was not interested in meeting with him…he ignored and forgot me…and this is where I told him it was strange he still had my number  yet for all his missing of me, he never once called to tell me he was returning to town. He answered an ad to seek companionship….this idiot comes back with “but it was YOUR ad.” I told him I was keeping all online interactions strictly business and he asked what that meant…I told him it meant financial generosity; he balked big time but when I pointed out he was offering generosity before he knew it was me, he agreed to an amount good only for the hour and wanted to meet RIGHT NOW. I told him I would let him know when I was ready to meet…and now I am going to let his emails do the talking…they began soon after the phone call:

Of course I am available to talk with you and be with you.  My memory has been sufficiently refreshed, I really enjoyed our get togethers, you really helped me deal with my stress.  After I hung up, I had a question, I thought our relationship had evolved past the “generours” date….You were insatiable when we were together…..I was saddened you couldn’t see me tonight but I understand you may feel the need to punish me.”

“I know you don’t believe me but I really have missed you and have not been with another woman since you. I a sorry I had brain farts and did not immediately remember you, but that does not mean I forgot about you or our times together. Our relationship is very special to me and I value our connection. Have you had any studs as good as me since we were last together?”

“Okay, now I can’t sleep thinking about the time we spent together.  I just looked at my schedule and it appears that I will be in mtgs until approximately 5pm each day, then I have to go to the gym (have to work on my girly figure, lol), go to dinner with my co-workers – then I am free to come cuddle with you.  Please send me your address so I can plug it into mapquest and get directions, so we both know how far I have to go.  I know we agreed on an amount but I am going to need a reduced donation seeing that I have to pay the gas to go all the way to/from your house.”

And to think…this man was almost my baby daddy…to think I was up at 2am having fucking meltdowns over this. I think I lost my mind, self-esteem and common sense without realizing it but I can say without a doubt, my Panel knows me better than anyone. They tell me constantly I lose myself over loser dudes and put complete assholes on pedestals when I am so far above them, it is ridiculous. It is as if I deliberately lower myself so they are elevated, and not a one of them is worthy of even a passing glance or thought.

So once again, the AFO incident is over and this time it is for real. This shit is ridiculous and I have to say, I brought it on myself when I mixed business with pleasure over a feeling. He does not have to worry about coming over to cuddle, or preparing lies and lines for me. I am beyond fine…I may not know what I want or what I deserve but I know I do not want or deserve this bullshit. Crazy is not part of the package, selfishness is not part of the package and being cheap? Get real.

Okay, so I am finally done and working on my next blog post…readers, thanks BUNCHES for sticking with me and this convoluted and largely unnecessary drama. Hey, at least I learned something from it…at least until the next guy I am willing to be foolish over comes along.






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