First, I am going to apologize for not posting sooner….this week has been weird to say the least. Work has been kicking my ass (doing my job as well as someone else’s), the cold is gone but my pain remains (although it is lessening) and I am just so lethargic all the time it is not funny. All I want to do is lay around and sleep…one would think I was the one who just had a baby versus New Mommy. But, after sleeping for almost 2 days straight (cannot believe I missed the Kid N Play reunion on Way Black When) I am ready to get back in the swing of things….for a little while at least.
Arguments…we all have them and we have them with everyone: parents, siblings, spouses/significant others, children, co-workers, friends, strangers and even ourselves. No two people will always ever agree and there will be times when we will not or cannot agree to disagree, and so the argument starts. Everyone is right, no one is wrong and things can get heated. My Panel and I have minor disagreements as we all know when another is about to just go out in left field, and when it reaches that point, we will hang up on that member. Not just hang up in the middle of the other person speaking, but we will let them know that right now talking to them is pretty much impossible and we will talk to them after they have calmed down. Cuz and I hear this statement a lot.
The majority of my arguments take place with my men and I am the WORST person to have an argument with….I am the one who will ALWAYS be right, and will do what I have to do to make sure of that. It helps (or maybe it doesn’t) that I have a unique way of looking at things (it will be true and honest, but no one else would ever think to view things the way I do) and hear what I want to hear, and will twist what I do hear so I am right and you are wrong.
I usually find if you hit a person with unadulterated facts, they will shut up, retreat and eventually concede. Married Man was the exception. He had only one rebuttal to any and everything I hit him with during our arguments….I was not his wife. I would tell him I may not be his wife, but I AM the chick whose bed he lays in, he eats my food, sticks his dick in my mouth and HE is the one who asked for a key to my apartment and wants me to see only him….so wife or not, he was going to give me the respect I was entitled to or he could get to steppin’. He would shut up. When I discovered he was bringing other women to my house while I was at work…maybe that was the beginning of the end. I had stayed home because I was sicker than two dogs and was asleep when I heard voices at my door and the key in the lock. Married Man opened the door partially and closed it quicker than shit….I heard footsteps running down the hall and then he comes back in, asking what was I doing home. THAT statement pissed me off so badly, I just went upside his head. No words, just popped the crap out of him. I then demanded to know why he was questioning the fact I was in MY house…he paid not ONE bill, and only made the bills I did have to pay a fucking necessity. Seriously, the man expected lunch every day he worked and a Sunday dinner on Saturday afternoon; he laid his naked ass in my bed on my sheets and had left skid marks a couple of times; he used my water, soap and wash cloths to wash his ass (after I saw the skid marks the second time, he had to wash before and after); he took dumps in my toilet and used my toilet tissue to wipe his ass; he sucked up my air in the summer and my heat in the winter……and he wanted to know what the fuck I was doing home? Then as I got closer to him, I smelled the perfume and saw the traces f lipstick on his lips….and it all fell together. I had noticed when I was getting home that my washcloth I used 12 hours earlier was still damp and I could sometimes still smell perfume in the air, but I paid it no attention…after all the man had a wife and he had me. Between us, his job and 7 kids, he would not have time for anyone else….but apparently he did and was using my home as his Hideaway Hotel….and I went off again. Between blows I called him all kinds of black, greasy bitches and no good motherfuckers….and to this day the man will insist he never brought anyone to my house or that he ever cheated on me.
There was the time we fought on the bus as he was riding some heifer around who was all grinning and skinning in his face….he insisted she was a tax client and I asked him to not have her on his bus when he asked me to ride with him, but he always did. She would stand right in front of the farebox, all in his face and showing so much cleavage, you could practically see her nipples. I told him very calmly that I do not expect to see that scenario when I rode with him again and if he valued and respected our relationship, that should not be a problem; he was pissed as hell. So the next time I rode with him, I caught him 3 stops before the one I usually got on at…..something told me to do so, and lo and behold….there she was. I told her to get her skank ass out of my man’s face….NOW and when he spoke up in her defense…..he got beat down on the job in front of all his passengers. He physically put me off the bus and told me if I ever boarded his bus again, he would call Transit Police on me….then had the nerve to show up at my house after he got off work.
He has answered his phone while we were being intimate (I have everyone in my complex hearing me call him a low down, no good sonofabitch and to get the HELL out) and we were banned from Hechinger Mall for fighting in a sporting goods store there. I have actually asked him if he was a pedophile as he watches nothing but Spongebob and Cartoon Network and the man got horny after watching the puppets in Team America simulate having sex. His exact words: “Come here and give me some cause the puppets have me horny.” He came over this week to do my taxes and asked me how was I going to pay him; I told him I was paying his going rate, and he said he wanted trade. I told him I was in a relationship (no sense in this guy knowing I had been dumped and was vulnerable) and he had a wife….we were over and let’s just enjoy the friendship. He said he had a wife and a girlfriend, but so what? The man has no sense of respect, fidelity or boundaries…he really doesn’t. I told him to get busy with my taxes and being a polite hostess, I asked was he hungry. I was not expecting him to be as he had been off work all day and had a wife and a girlfriend, but he said he was starving. Really? TWO women and you come to my house starving? But, I heated him up some leftover Chinese food….just in time for him to tell me that my refund this year is cut by a good $2,000!! I went OFF….none of my information has changed in 5 years and he kept trying to talk about tax law changes. See, I said nothing last year when he fucked my taxes up so badly the state insisted I owe them and he can get Buddy damn near $8,000 back and Buddy worked sporadically at best last year. I accused him of fucking over my money because I would not fuck him, snatched my food back from him and threw him out. He asked why did I take his food away and I told him if he could not get me any money back so I could go grocery shopping, I had me holding onto all my damned food. We have not talked since and if he is expecting an apology, he can hold his breath.
Morning Person and Artsy Craftsy both insist he did not fuck me over….he was not taking any chances of messing up another chance to be with me and maybe I just fell into a higher tax bracket this time around. Mini-Me told me perhaps if I had been nicer to him, I would have more money….and I have her saying I should have fucked him, so she got cursed out for trying to be a pimpstress. She kept insisting she did not mean it that way, but if ANYONE can tell me how else she could have meant it or I could have taken it, please tell me. I was pleasant to the man, we made the small talk, he watched his program on my TV AND I was feeding him….so tell me how I could have been nicer?
You know, this is going to be a two part blog….I had no idea Married Man would take up as much of the post as he has and I can combine my arguments with Him and a progress report on where I am in the process and concerning Him in the next post….so we only talk about him once this week versus twice. I still need to fold and put away laundry, run a vacuum and get started on the next post. Thanks for stopping back by and reading, have a great day and we will talk sooner and more often than we have been.